I sliced my finger open

not in a bloody way... but in that the top layer of skin is sliced and it hurts a little kind of way. I think it'd feel better if i put a band-aid on it, but it's not bleeding so i can't/won't do that.

The past two weekends have been a blur. We went to Chicago last week for a party and to see some friends. It made me happy. I laff a lot more when i'm not in DC.

This weekend we headed to Denver. I was there on business but i dragged BJ along so we could catch Game 3 of the World Series. Friday night was the third annual team dinner at the Buckhorn Exchange. I had the yak and the ostrich... YUMMY. Both were quite delicious but the yak killed it. I also had some rattlesnake which was kinda eh. All in all the meal was great.

The people in Denver were amazingly nice. Friday we headed to a party after the dinner hosted by DJ Low Key. He's a cool cat and probably as big a Pete Rock fan as me. He was djing at a rooftop party which was pretty cool. We slept thru most of Saturday but wound up at the Original Pancake House about 20 minutes before it closed. From there we went off in search of mountains... and couldn't find them. I mean i googled, mapquested and everything else i could think of but we just couldn't find those sons of bitches. So we went back to the room to nap some more (thin, dry air makes you thirsty and sleepy)and then headed to the game.
It ws cold. Plain and simple.
But the Red Sox won so i was happy.

We woke up at about 3am this morning to catch our 6am flight back to DC... too bad the plane didnt really leave until 9am :( Oops

I'm home safe and sound now, full of spaghetti and ready to go to sleep.

I Wish I Could Have Said Something

Today I was doing some research for the Admin Law Review and came across a database of newspapers. On a whim I looked up some newspaper articles about a friend who had shot this guy. It was the trial i was supposed to testify at. The trial at which I was threatened. His lawyer wanted to call me as a character witness. I didn't even know what that meant back then. All I knew was that they said they would kill me/us if we testified. His lawyer wanted these two prep school graduates, these two college freshman to testify. She wanted these outstanding citizens to testify to how they were friends with the shooter. We were 18 and scared for our lives.

She never asked us our version of what happened. Never realized that we held the key to the self defense claim that she was using for her client. She never even believed her own client's version of the events of 12/29/92. The detectives never asked either. It really wasn't their place though. But I didn't know he was getting railroaded. After the event, I wasn't allowed to read the newspaper. I wasn't really allowed to watch the news. If I did I would've known. I would've heard that the prosecutor was saying that i was with him, when the victim innocently said hi to me and that my friend.. a monster.... lashed out and viciously killed him. If I had known I would have told someone. I would've told them that as i sat at the table the victim came up to me and made lude comments. I would have said that as my friend walked past he said something to me. I would have mentioned how the victim chased after my friend and how everyone at the table agreed that the victim had been looking for a fight all night...

But i didn't know and I didn't speak up. And they didn't do their job. And they didn't ask. And now, some 15 yrs later, i feel guilty. But that's the story of my life it seems. Looking back after the fact and wishing i had done something. I don't know if those guys would have really killed us. It wasn't a gamble i wanted to take. I don't know why no one ever asked us what happened. It seems like a simple part of an investigation to talk to witnesses. I don't know why life seemed to speed up so much after that. I don't know so many things... Some things I want the answers to and some I'm trying to let go of. I just want to stop living with so many regrets. I think this may have been my wake up call.

We'll see

Pete is mad and I couldn't be happier

That's the new (to me) Pete Rock. He's angry and rightfully so. I'm not really sure why Pete doesn't get the respect he deserves, but he gets a little of the frustration off his chest now. I can't wait to hear the new album. For now enjoy. And yes, he's writing his own lyrics and doing a good job at it.

Enjoy, bitches.

Interviews, Piercings, and Pregnancy

I'll go ahead and get the last one out of the way first. No, it ain't me. It's my niece. I'm toggling between joy, fear and jealousy. I sometimes wonder if all of "i hate babies" talk has in some way jinxed/doomed me to a childless existence. Then I think about alllll the other stuff I've talked shit about and realize that that probably isn't the case. But yes, she's having a baby and I wish her all the best.

I had my interview with the organization in Berkeley on Thursday. I have NO clue how it went. I mean I don't think I said anything too off the wall or even remotely off the wall. The lady and I seemed to get along well enough and often, after I'd say something she'd say how that would be an asset to the org. I thought maybe that was an unconscious clue to me that I should do more to relate the answers to the org but then the direction changed so I didn't get the chance.

I went to NY for the day today and walked my poor little feet off. I'm pretty achy right now but lord knows i needed the exercise. While I was there I got my other tragus pierced. The guy that did it was really cool and offered to show me several of his piercings.... Not in a perverted way... more in a "damnit i have my butt pierced and i need someone to see this shit" (no pun intended). I politely declined. I also politely declined when he asked me if i wanted to see some pics of him doing suspension work... ummm ewwwwww

I think that's about all for me. I've decided to go ahead and accept the gig at the DOJ (no it wasn't ever really a decision). I'm not looking forward to the background check but, hopefully, it'll make things easier if I wind up back in the govt. Now, I'm gonna go soak my feet.

So I've Been MIA

But i'm back now... kinda.

I admit I feel a bit obligated to make this entry but I want to, too.... kinda

At any rate, I've started going back to my therapist :-\

Did I mention I hate her? No, I don't hate her but I need to look elsewhere. This week we spent more time than I had planned discussing how i'm getting old and how if i want to pop out some kids i should do it sooner rather than later. Although I already knew that the picture she painted was sooooo bleak. I'm bout to go get knocked up like tomorrow. So, yeah, I'm trying to reorganize my life (again) to see if a baby could be worked into this mix.

*insert LONG sigh here*

In other news I've got two possible AMAZING job opportunities. Like it's scary to think what the next year of my life might be like. It could be pretty amazing though. There's the government internship and then a summer associate position for this organization in Berkeley. So many possibilities. And I honestly plan to make the best of both. I wouldn't be havin a baby by then so I see no reason to turn either down or anything else... for now. The next 12 - 20 months will be a mix of moving forward and getting ready for a possible new addition. Of course we're still negotiating the new one. We'll see what happens.